Chapter 1: The Role of Beliefs in Our Comfort Zone

Beliefs serve an essential purpose by helping us mitigate the anxiety associated with uncertainty. An inherent principle of the human mind suggests that the familiar feels safe, whereas the unfamiliar breeds discomfort and fear. This survival instinct, deeply rooted in our biological and anthropological past, was critical when dangers lurked in every shadow, ensuring that cautious individuals thrived while the more adventurous often did not.

Despite living in a world that is statistically safe, this primal instinct continues to influence our emotions, causing varying degrees of anxiety when we encounter the unknown.

Here’s a thought experiment: Consider the belief, “I have no idea what will happen next.” Repeat it to yourself as though it's undeniably true and notice the familiar feelings that arise. Now, shift to the belief, “Something negative could occur.” You’ll likely feel your body respond, preparing you for one of the classic fight-or-flight reactions.

Holding onto beliefs, even incorrect ones, can provide a comforting layer of protection against discomfort. They serve as a mental refuge, like assuring yourself that a creaky floorboard is merely the house settling or that there are no monsters hiding in the dark.

When a figure of authority reassures us of our safety from perceived threats, we often feel a sense of relief. This need for protection explains the rise of charismatic leaders, who evoke fears of external dangers and promise security through their strength. The desire for a "protector" stems from a deep-rooted need to feel safe from uncertainties.

Our instinct to prepare for the unknown is driven by an innate survival mechanism. Understanding potential challenges enhances our chances of thriving in unpredictable situations, whether it's a snowstorm or a crisis. When we "figure it out," we essentially form a belief. Although our universe tends to be predictable, the reality is that we now navigate a volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous (VUCA) world. Traditional planning often falls short in the face of unexpected events, such as an oil spill from a drilling rig. When emergencies arise, maintaining awareness becomes paramount.

In moments of uncertainty regarding past experiences, beliefs act as valuable explanatory tools. A child grappling with trauma might internalize the notion that they are to blame for their circumstances, concluding, “I must be a bad person.” Such beliefs can offer a false sense of resolution, easing the discomfort of the unknown while embedding fallacious ideas deep within their psyche.

Each belief formed serves to diminish anxiety or uncertainty. Recall the feeling of dread when called upon in class without knowing the answer—a sense of shame amplified by peers’ laughter. This can motivate some children to adopt proactive beliefs, like, “I’ll study hard to avoid that feeling again.” Conversely, others may internalize a more damaging belief: “I’m just not smart enough; I’ll never succeed.”

Beliefs don’t simply vanish once their relevance has waned. Even as adults, outdated beliefs can resurface under similar circumstances, triggering an emotional response that transports us back to childhood. When faced with a challenging question from a superior, the familiar pangs of shame can re-emerge, leaving us feeling like a child again.

Releasing these outdated beliefs opens the door to embracing new, empowering ones. Recognizing that while beliefs can offer comfort, they may not always be beneficial allows us to confront the unknown with a centered presence. This shift revives our innate curiosity and enthusiasm, enabling us to experience life more fully and freely. By letting go of the compulsion to seek certainty, we can engage in a richer, more vibrant existence.

Video: Overcome Anxiety and Fear of the Unknown - YouTube

This video provides insights and strategies to overcome anxiety and embrace the uncertainty that life presents.

Chapter 2: Embracing the Unfamiliar

The journey through discomfort continues as we learn to navigate the unfamiliar.

Video: Uncomfortable with the Unfamiliar (Fear of the Unknown) - Tapping with Brad Yates

In this video, Brad Yates demonstrates tapping techniques to help alleviate the fear associated with the unknown.

The story was previously published on The Good Men Project. About Lion Goodman

Lion Goodman is a Professional Certified Transformational Coach and the creator of the Clear Beliefs Method, which facilitates the rapid clearing of limiting beliefs. He co-founded The Tribe of Men and authored five books, including "Creating On Purpose" and "Menlightenment." To learn more, visit www.LionGoodman.com and www.ClearBeliefs.com.