Believing That "Love Conquers All"

As a child, I was enchanted by romantic comedies and Disney films, which often portrayed love as an unstoppable force. I embraced this idea completely until reality hit during my first serious relationship. Despite our deep affection, we struggled with communication and life planning.

The Greek philosopher Plato wisely stated, “The greatest wealth is to live content with little,” which applies to love as well. True love involves happiness within the relationship and collaboration to navigate challenges. I learned that, while love is powerful, it requires effort, patience, and sometimes even professional guidance to thrive.

Expecting Your Partner to Complete You

Do you remember the iconic line from "Jerry Maguire": “You complete me”? While it sounds romantic, it can lead to unhealthy dynamics. I once believed that a partner could fill every void in my life, which ultimately led to disappointment and undue pressure on them.

The truth is, you must be whole on your own. Your partner's role is to support you, not to be the missing piece of your identity. As Epictetus said, “He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.” Focus on your individuality and self-care, ensuring that you’re satisfied with yourself to foster a healthy relationship.

The first video, "Why and how you sabotage love (+how to stop)" explores how common habits can undermine relationships and offers actionable steps for improvement.

Thinking Jealousy is a Sign of Love

Jealousy is often portrayed in media as a testament to love, but in reality, it is a toxic emotion. I once felt proud when my partner exhibited jealousy, mistaking it for care. However, jealousy breeds mistrust and negativity.

It stems from insecurity and fear rather than love, which is built on trust and appreciation. The Roman philosopher Seneca stated, “He who indulges empty fears, gets himself real fears.” Instead of nurturing jealousy, focus on building trust within your relationship.

Believing Love at First Sight is Common

Movies often convince us that love at first sight is the norm, but this is rarely the case. Long-term relationships typically develop gradually. I remember turning down a wonderful person simply because I lacked that initial spark.

As Marcus Aurelius noted, “You have power over your mind — not outside events.” Don’t dismiss potential connections based on immediate chemistry. Give love the chance to evolve over time.

Expecting Your Partner to Read Your Mind

I once thought that true love meant my partner would instinctively know my needs. This belief led to disappointment and resentment.

The reality is that no one can read minds. It’s crucial for both partners to communicate openly and honestly. Avoid assuming your partner understands your thoughts or feelings; clarity is key.

Thinking Love Should Always Be Exciting

The initial excitement of a new relationship can be exhilarating, but when that phase fades, many people worry something is wrong. I experienced anxiety when the butterflies disappeared in my long-term relationship, fearing we had lost our spark.

However, love naturally evolves from exhilaration to a comforting bond. Recognize the difference between comfort and boredom, and appreciate the stability that long-term relationships provide.

Believing You Need to Find "The One"

While the idea of a soulmate is appealing, it can be misleading. I once believed there was only one perfect person for me, which created immense pressure and led to disappointment.

In truth, many individuals could make you happy. It’s about finding someone who complements your needs and working together to build a stable partnership. Focus on being the best version of yourself, rather than seeking perfection in a partner.